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21 oktober 2008

[lang_SE]Nedan kommer jag publicera ett antal texter… kan ni gissa VEM UTAN att googla (mooolin …aja baja)ADAM SANDLER

—————–Text 1———————–

I was driving around in old Mexico, I got lost and didn’t know which way to go, I was confused, it was late and I was in a fog, I ran over the Taco Bell dog. I felt that smush and I said, ”Oh mama” My low rider crushed that little Chihuahua. I prayed for forgiveness in a Synagogue, I ran over the Taco Bell dog. If I am caught they will put me in a cell with 20 locks, Unless I can pin it on Jack in the Box. I’ll be whipped, then beaten and then I’ll be flogged, I ran over the Taco Bell dog. His last words were, ”Yo quiero el médico”, I flattened that pup, to Hell I would go. I should of skipped driving and gone for a jog, I ran over the Taco Bell dog. I ran over the Taco Bell dog. I ran over the Taco Bell dog.

——————————-text 2——————————–

Jabawokee ding dong Slip slap slee Dipstick paddywhack Pee pee googalee gee Polly wolly sling slang Skooey dibbely doo Wing wong ping pong King Kong Cheech ‘n Chong Hop hip kagagoogoo Hickory dickory slickory flip flap Dip skip to my Lou Flim flam wham blam Sam bam Cunningham Whack snack koochie koochie koo Plus you gotta dip, you gotta doodle You gotta eat Grandma’s stroodle ‘Cause she stayed up all night to make it from scratch You gotta gish, you gotta gash You gotta wax Grandma’s mustache And lay out her socks To make sure they match Whoa, you gotta help out your Grandma Slappety dappety sling skism skasm Bing bang boo A yip, a yap, a snippety snap Walla, walla scrappy dappy doo Piddle paddle fiddle faddle widdle waddle Awhee clunkety clang A plop, a fizz, a whackety whiz Chitty chitty bang wang lang Zippity doo dang lipidee ay Oompa loompa doo A piggly wiggly dooda Stinky winky linky foo man choo Plus you gotta dip, you gotta doodle You gotta shave Grandma’s poodle ‘Cause Grandma would do the same for you You gotta libby, you gotta labby You gotta hug Grandma, even though she’s flabby ‘Cause you should know Grandma’s are people too Whoa, you gotta love your Grandma Now if you listened to the words of this song You know they’re coming straight from the heart Never make fun of your Grandma Even when she rips a juicy fart And remember to dip you gotta doodle You gotta stop playing with your noodle ‘Cause Grandma said it will make you go blind You gotta gipper, you gotta giper You gotta change Grandma’s diaper And then pretend that you really didn’t mind Whoa, respect to the Grandma

———————————text 3—————————–

I am a simple goat I live on the back of a pick-up truck The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope Am I happy he don’t give a fuck ”Hey goat im going to beat your head in with a hickory stick” Somtimes he uses his fists He’s filled with anger, and filled with rage And tells me I smell like piss His drink, Jimmy Bean His chaser, a beer After that, various alcohols That’s when the beatings get so severe Asleep I pray he falls But don’t feel sorry for me Things weren’t always this bad Why, when I was a young talking goat The Old Man was just like my dad I come from the hills of Europe That’s where I met the Old Man He was lost in the woods, I gave him directions He gave me a tuna can Then he stopped in his tracks And he said, ”Hey Goat! Would you like to live with me? I’ve got a house with a pick-up truck In a place across the sea” I said, ”Sure, why not, I’ve got no family You seem like a nice guy” So we went off to America The home of apple pie On the boat, the Old Man told me I would be a present for his wife ”A talking goat!” he exclaimed, ”She’d never seen this in her life” I felt so special! Well, I just couldn’t believe it After all these years I finally had a friend He trimmed my beard He scraped my hooves I prayed it would never end But when we got to his house There was no wife Only a short, short letter It said: ”I’m leaving you for your brother Because he fucks me better” His eyes filled with tears of sadness His heart was filled with grief To soothe himself he drank a pint of Old Granddad And beat me like a side of beef I screamed, ”Send me back to the hills of Europe!” He just shook his head and said, ”Nope! No one will ever leave me again To make sure, put on this 3-foot fucking rope.” Present day, I’ve been on the truck for 51 years My only friend is the AM radio Sometimes the neighborhood children stop by But it’s always rocks and beer bottles that they throw At first they’re excited to see a talking goat They gather around to hear what I have to say But I guess sometimes my stories go on too long So they leave and giggle I need a bidet But you know there was a night that I did get off the truck When the Old Man was passed out drunk Three neighborhood kids took me to a rock ‘n roll concert The kind of music, old-school funk It was the first time I got off the truck The music made me lose control The lead singer asked if we were having fun I said, ”Fucking crank that rock ‘n roll!” The women at the show were beautiful As they danced sexily on the soft grass One of them even petted my fur Fuck me in the goat-ass! Then some long-haired guys grabbed me by the horns And threw me in the mosh pit They passed me around and treated me nice Till I nerviously sprayed them with shit Then the music stopped And everything was quite And all the rock ‘n rollers started a fucking goat-riot Kill the goat! Kill the goat! Kill the goat! Kill the goat! They chased me under the bleachers They chased me onto the street They chased me into an alley And said I was a dead fucking goat meat But then I saw a sight That I never thought I’d see The Old Man swinging his hickory stick But he wasn’t swinging at me ”Fuck you, pot-smoking turkeys! Don’t you press your luck!” The long hairs ran away screaming As I scrambled onto the truck When we got home, the Old Man said, ”Goat, you broke the sacred law No! Please! Sorry! Shit! I’ll let it go this time, but if you leave again I’ll break your fucking jaw!” Super! Great! Okay! ”Thank you Old Man, for saving my life Thank you again and again You could have let them barbeque me, But you acted like a friend” ”I’m not your friend, I don’t even like you I’m just not drunk,” he said To prove his point, he drank a bottle of grain alcohol And beat the fucking shit out of my head. That night a suffered a concusion deep inside my goat brain I still cannot feel my tailbone And Ill probaby never walk straight again I guess you’d call me a scapegoat A punching bag for the Old Man to mock Just because his wife left him For his brother’s abnormally large cock He could have been my buddy But instead he’s a crazy old fuck And, once again, I go to sleep in my eternal home The back of the pick-up truck Goodnight, Old Man! Yeah, goodnight Goat!

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Gissa på bara .. jag avslöjar framåt dagen vem det är!

[/lang_SE]

Måndagsbarn är ögonfröjd.

Tisdagsbarn är älskvärdhet.

Onsdagsbarn får lida ont.

Torsdagsbarn stita tungt.

Fredagsbarn är goda och givmilda.

Lördagsbarn får arbeta för födan.

Söndagsbarn är sött och snällt, glatt och sällt.

Måndagsbarn är snällt och rart.

Tisdagsbarn gör allt med fart.

Onsdagsbarn är kärt besvär.

Torsdagsbarn gör fin karriär.

Fredagsbarn gör gärna gott.

Lördagsbarn får slita hårt.

Söndagsbarn har det alltid bra och får de mesta de vill ha.